he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Randomize
