so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
