I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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