Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
