Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
The adults are the big ones right?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
