i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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