i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I AM VODKA MAN
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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