is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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