Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
