Little spoons don't ask big questions
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
