physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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