She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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