if only i could text you this smell
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
