never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize