please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
