I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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