My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
