it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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