Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
