I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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