Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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