im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize