this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
