hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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