dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
it's like heaven, but drunker
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
