put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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