I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
