Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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