They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
