I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
