I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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