What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize