Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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