Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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