You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I need to sanitize my soul.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Randomize
