i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
