i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
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