Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
