i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
