I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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