Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
