she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
should my penis look like a turkey
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
