is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
