We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
