yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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