its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
