So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
