and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
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