So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I have already put on my inside pants.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
