i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
